Full

It is one of those nights, I can't sleep and I don't know why and for some reason I cannot wipe a stupid grin from off my face. I am a little confused about it because nothing really good has happened recently,  no new news, no new relationship, nothing at all is really new in my life, but here I am awake after midnight smiling like crazy and I have no reason to actually be so happy. It has been a slow build up over the last few days. An over welming sense of hope and happiness has just been building up imside of me, so I had to write about it.
I am sitting uere listening to American Authors loving life and just feeling capable of conquering the world. I just keep thinking about how blessed I am and how awesome my life has been and how wonderful my life is. I can not complain really about how my life is, I am blessed and I know it. I know that I have made some greatchoices in my life that have lead me to where I am and I couldn't be happier.  Life is just funny that way, I am happy. I am happy for no reason.
No, not for no reason, I am hapy that I am alive! I am happy that I am me! That I have had so many wonderful opportunities both in the past and in the future. I am blessed and because of that I am full full of joy and happiness.

Little Moments

I watched this video the other day and I really enjoyed it. There is a quote in it that I really like at the very beginning by Neal A. Maxwell that says "Moments are the molecules that make up eternity." What a beautiful thought that this is, we have been given one of the greatest gifts by God to be alive, and we have the opportunity to experience so much in this life. We are meant to live it and actually act there is so much beauty and wonder to experience outside. It's amazing that God has given us such a beautiful world to live and and there is so much to learn about and to explore. I know he loves us because he has given us so much. In the scriptures God tells us that we exist so that we can have joy. and if we take the time to look for it and do things that we find fun we will have joy in this life. Our lives are made up of the memories of our pasts and the dreams of the future. It's such a amazing way of looking at the world and I know for a fact that this world is one that if we seek for happiness in the right places and moments we will not have any regrets.

I Am Possible

I found this wonderfull little quote on Facebook today and true to my word with my previous post I thought I would share this with y'all. This is a cute quote and it's quite inspirational to me. I have hit several road blocks in my life and there are times that I feel like giving up. I tell myself that it's impossible and I give up trying, but that is not the case nothing in this life is truly impossible if you work hard enough at it and have the right tools. I have learned that more and more as I have worked my way through life. What we often call impossible is just hard, but here is my word of advice to you; the things that are truly worth it in this life are rarely going to be easy. Those things that push us and try us in the end are going to be of the greatest worth to us when we reach the end of our lives. I know for a fact that the impossible is achievable especially when we seek the help of the Savior.

Hole in my soul

I have posted several times that I love life and I am truly grateful to be living and experiencing things here on earth, but I have a story to tell y’all that applies to finding that happiness and feeling at peace with myself. As some of you may know I am a member of the church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day saints and I have posted about it before in one of my first Blog posts since getting home in from my mission almost three years ago. I can hardly believe that it has been that long. Time really is like sand that sifts through fingers.

When I go back from my mission I made a promise to myself that I would never go back to the way that I was before the mission years. Before I left on my mission I had very little interest in all things spiritual, but while I was on my mission I repented and made a huge effort to get closer to God and feel his spirit in my life. It was an amazingly life changing experience that I wouldn't exchange for anything in the world. It is one of the major experiences in my life that I attribute to who I am today.

The thing is that while you are on a mission you live by strict guidelines that helped me to live life in a more spiritual way. They help you to learn how to get closer to the Heavenly father all while teaching the gospel to others. For me it was a wonderful experience that helped to change a lot, but returning from the mission is a completely different adventure. You have to learn how to adapt to regular life again which is a trial in itself.

I am sorry to say that I did not adapt very well, as time went on I got farther and farther away from my heavenly father, and one day it just hit me, that I was missing something in my life. I had hit a point where I was knew I was missing it in my life. I could feel a hole where I had felt peace and happiness beforehand.  I wanted to feel that happiness so bad I was longing for it and I knew that the reason that I didn’t feel it was because I had gotten away from making an effort to be closer to him, and as I pondered upon the last three years I began to realize that I couldn’t blame anyone else but myself for where I currently stood. I had walked there myself away from light and I had to walk back towards the light.

The reason I share this is because I want to at least help someone realize the important of the light of Christ in our lives. There is a current trend to ignore everything spiritual in this world and just focusing on the spiritual pleasure that we can get out of this life. I am here to tell you that I have lived on both sides and just living for physical pleasure does not bring happiness. It’s kind of hard to explain, but as I experienced it I began to feel like I was being hollowed out.  It was almost as if someone or something was slowly piece by piece scooping out the quiet happy serenity that I had begun to enjoy while I was on my mission and living my life in a very spiritual way. I knew it was my fault but as I moved farther and farther away from the light I began to see that it was only through my stupidity that I began to lose my sense of security and life. I had fallen to one of the greatest lies that has been told throughout history, I was victim of spiritual negligence.

When I hit this epiphany I could feel a huge hole inside me. I felt horrible and I knew that I was missing something. I know for a fact that I need god in my life and that without him I can’t have the same kind of happiness that comes with being spiritual. There is a distinct difference between the two types of happiness and I wanted the quiet serenity and Identity that came with spirituality. So for the past few weeks I have been making a big effort to look at life through a more spiritual mind set, and it has helped so much, I have been so edified and I have gotten to feel the spirit in my life and try as I did I was not able to fill it up any other way.

I know that there is a trend these days that diminishes the importance of being spiritual but I testify to you that it is absolutely is. God loves us and he wants us to be happy, but the only way that we can have a fullness of joy is if we seek him out. He loves us greatly and as we make an effort to get closer to him we will be able to feel happier it has been the case with me.

I am going to try and share with you over the next couple days some of the religious stuff that I have been listening to and watching over the last couple of days. I feel like people everywhere need a little bit of a pick me up during the day and I want to share with y’all what I has touched me and helped me to feel a little bit happier and a little bit closer to God.

I am

                          I am a creator of adventures and a collector of memories. I have an undying love affair with the new and unknown and a passion for the stories that can and could be. They call me, beckoning me to heed the call of of the promise of excitement and and wonder. Pondering the possibilities before me excites me and prepares me even more for the adventure that is ahead of me. It is a call I must answer and an itch that I must scratch. I want to know, no, I have to know what is out there. The world outside my front door is teeming with life. Thousands of possible scenarios spread out before me and billions of lives being lived folding out in front of me. All these stories unfolding before me, interweaving, mingling and crisscrossing through one another. Each one is uniquely beautiful in it’s own way, Narrating the story of the human spirit, teaching me what it means to be alive. It inspires me to  look beyond my secure world and venture forth into the unknown and mingle with the memories that are blooming before me, creating my own as I explore the webs of information that is strung throughout the world. I love these stories, they inspire me and make me a better person than I was before. As I gain more knowledge I share it with the world, communicating to them the information that I learned. Because that what we are meant to do with stories, they are meant to  be shared. They are an expression of who we are and illustrate to others our hopes dreams and beliefs are woven into the fabrics of their being. In the end we all leave stories behind, I want mine to be one worth listening to. A story that I would like to read and share with others, our lives are our legacy. They are the only thing that is left of us after  our spirits leave our bodies. My story is one about a man who is a collects experiences and creates memories, it’s is who I am

RIP Sheila

Today has been kind of  hard for me, I lost one of my best friends after about six years the best friendships I have ever had. My dog Sheila died today after getting hit by a car just on the main road from our house. I wasn't there to  witness the death because I am  at college, but I am really sad that I lost her. She was my best friend and absolutely amazing, she was always there for me and such a wonderful companion and little bugger.

I loved he from the day that I met her, I was the one that brought her home from when I worked as a landscaper back in Georgia. She was just a little puppy then and absolutely adorable, I have always had a soft spot for animals, and she just stole my  heart away the instant that I laid eyes on her. I got her for free from this family whose dog had just given birth to a litter of puppies and the couldn't keep them all. I knew that my  parents weren't animal people, but I figured that it was better to  ask for forgiveness rather than permission at that point. I had always wanted a dog and I thought that it would be the perfect opportunity to actually get a dog.

I brought her home with me after work and my mom was furious, I can still remember her face contorted into an angry brow and all she could say was “No” over and over again. I really wanted my dog and convinced my parents to let her stay until I could find her a decent home. My  mother’s heart was eventually softened when the poor little puppy walked around my foyer and just collapsed on the tile flooring. She was so cute and my mom agreed that she could stay, if only temporarily. I was so ecstatic because I  had managed to  get a dog into my home for the first time in a long time.

We kept her for a few days and my parents kept telling me that I couldn't name the dog because we were not going to keep her, I really wanted to  keep and eventually I broke my parents down and we finally got to name the little Australian Shepard. I don’t remember the exact circumstances as to why we decided that we were going out to eat, but that night we went to Outback Steak House. We were celebrating something as a family and the main thing on my sibling’s and my mind was what to name the dog. Picking out a name, even for a dog can be a tricky business, so we heatedly debated about what it was that we wanted to name her.  Our answer came when I went to  the bathroom. For those of you who don’t know the bathrooms of Outback Steak  House have slang terms written on them from Australia. Blokes for guys and Sheila for girls, when I saw that I knew instantly that I had a name for my  dog. She was going to  be called Sheila.

She turned out to  be an amazing dog and I  have so many  memories of her. She loved to play catch and she was a little stinker. She would often times do something that she knew was wrong and in the end feel really bad about it. So she would punish herself by sitting by the garage door until we would open it so she could go into timeout in her kennel. She was awesome, and I am truly going to miss her. It’s quite sad that I  won’t be seeing her again, but I know that I will see her in heaven.

Playing the Date Doctor

I love Valentine’s Day, I am a romantic and I love the idea of spoiling a girl, it’s fantastic. I love coming up with cool ideas and surprising girls. It’s one of my hobbies, I love to plan exciting new activities and adventures when I am in a relationship. This year was different, I am single and there aren’t any girls that I am trying to date. All the girls that I have been interested in are either in a relationship or very close to getting married. It’s just my luck. So instead of feeling bad for myself I counted my  blessings and decided to play  the date doctor instead.

                One of my favorite romantic comedies is Hitch with Will Smith. I think it’s one of his best movies by far and I  love the story behind it. The main character is a guy who helps other men be the best that they can be so that they  can get the girl of their dreams. That’s pretty much what I did this year, since I am  single I decided to try something different than feeling sorry for myself.

 I decided that I was going to give as many girls that I know a great Valentine’s day. Many of the girls that I know are single and I realized that they needed to have a special day, even when they don’t have a boyfriend. So I set out to making Valentine’s Day cards out of the some canvas and red fabric I had left over from some other art projects that I have been engaged In. I have also made them some delicious chocolate chip cookies, because no  girl can resist chocolate or cookies, especially when they  are combined together. It was a huge success, and I know for a fact that my  friends loved them.

                That didn’t end my escapade of setting people up I also helped several of my other friends who are either in a relationship or married. They all had one thing in common, they were all drawing a blank as far as what to  do for this special day. One of my friends in my spinning class had no idea what to give her boyfriend so  I told her that she could buy him a pocket watch and inscribe their names in the inside of it.  I also helped another friend of mine pick out fabric for a blanket that she was making her boyfriend. The last thing that I helped with was my friend from work who  had completely forgotten about Valentine’s Day and had signed up  to work extra hours. It would have been late to actually do an elaborate date, so instead I suggested that he set up a bubble bath by candlelight and have some drinks together in the apartment.

                Each one of my friends was very happy with the results of the their dates and activities too. I think I did a pretty good job at helping these people out, and I got to be a date doctor for a day. I should really start charging people money for this service and start living off of this talent.